Les Sentiments d'Aujourd'hui

Today hasn't been great. I've spent most of the day feeling despondent, empty, and maybe lonely. I don't want to say despair, as I think despair has too much energy to it. I've just been feeling like I'm dead inside, and should be dead on the outside too. Everything seems pointless.

Yet, I have been slightly motivated, too. I opened the curtains, did a little painting, and played GTA. I intended to finish the bed head this afternoon, but fell asleep. 

Kittens always make my heart smile, even when everything else feels bleak. I wish we had different words for different types of love, in English, as they do in some languages. I feel love every time I spend time with the kittens, I just don't know which kind. Kitten love!

This evening the Mercenary Man was online. Just chatting to him has lifted my spirits a lot. He seems fairly low himself though, which concerns me. 

I'm hoping that tomorrow and / or Tuesday, I can get the bed finished, so that we can put it together upstairs. I'm sleeping downstairs tonight so that I've no excuse in the morning. 

I started thinking yesterday about feline qualifications. I've looked several times, but I've never found something along the lines of a degree in "Feline Studies". Now it's occurred to me, I can't stop designing the degree in my head. I may have to write it down to stop it going round in circles.

So, anyway, emotions today...

- despondent

- empty

- lonely?

- dead inside

- pointless

- motivated

- kitten love

- uplifted

- concerned

- hope

- obsessive